recapping a day of turbulent tranquility.

perhaps a deceiving title, because lulled by the gentle cascade of evening breeze there is the silent roar of an approaching train threatening to engulf me whole. and i, motionless with mechanical indifference, what can i do except play witness to my own destruction?

it is 12:38 am and i sit in bed awake, hungry for the taste of my own words that have dissipated along with the whirring motions of life. it’s been a strange, strange few days; one moment i am relishing swarms of emotions flooding through me, the next i am abysmally hollow and devoid of feeling. here is me then, rummaging through the clutters of my mind to salvage the remnants of who i think i am.

---

things that made me smile today:

my piano duet rehearsal in which my friend asserted that john lennon was ‘that russian history guy’ (lenin);

conversations with human gems;

at first hesitantly then frantically waving and grinning at my teacher inside her car. was met with equally enthusiastic waving and grinning. then walked closer and realised that she was not teacher but stranger. two fellow strangers waving and grinning makes a very wholesome encounter;

bombing my maths test today and waking up to the ramifications of questionable life choices;

valiant attempts singing vivaldi in choir with the wonderful martha.

---

right now, enveloped by darkness, there is still peace and love and soft mellow blues. i am strangely content, embracing the composed chaoticness that life requires us to rock. so goodnight: heading to bed now, and tomorrow – oh, tomorrow i’m hopping on that damn train.